News and Nonsense (Monday Edition)

• Lola Ogunnaike profiles Aaron McGruder. (NYT)
• "Blinglish": the new slang. (Independent)
• Plastic surgery for those who can't afford the Sharon Osbourne plan. (Newsweek)
• Some people just need to move on. (SkyNews)
• If Sly Stallone can do "Rocky VI", why not make another Rambo movie, too? It's not as if he's got anything else to do to pass the time these days. (MSNBC)
• Has Star Jones completely lost her mind? (Perez Hilton)
• I guess it's appopriate that someone chose Paris Hilton to play "the world's most famous no-talent" in a movie. This role should be a shoe-in for her. (Radar)
• Geraldo Rivera, the original Jerry Springer, returns to the daytime circuit with a syndicated news show. This time, he pledges to keep it classy, and not klassy. (USA Today)
• Upstate New Yorkers are terrified that OJ Simpson may be moving into town.
• Debbie Rowe, Michael Jackson's ex-wife, has been banned from telling her children that she is their mother; that duty will be left to the tabloids, and strangers on the street.
• Maureen Dowd... WTF is her purpose, anyway? (TMFTML)